


Gloria Academy

by The_Lady_Crane



Series: Serpi's FEHverse [6]
Category: Fire Emblem Heroes, Fire Emblem Series, Super Smash Brothers
Genre: Alpha/Omega, Crack Treated Seriously, Crushes, Cute Kids, Ensemble Cast, Explicit Language, Humor, I just love writing Priam OK?, Implied Mpreg, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Minor Violence, Mostly ensemble but a bit Priam-centric, Multi, School, Weirdness, but most of these kids still believe in cooties
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-28
Updated: 2021-01-28
Packaged: 2021-03-10 01:47:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 11,993
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27962516
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Lady_Crane/pseuds/The_Lady_Crane
Summary: The Summoner of Castle Gloria decides to set up structured education for the heroes' children, and it all goes downhill from there.
Relationships: Aqua | Azura/My Unit | Kamui | Corrin, Camilla/Ryoma (Fire Emblem), Chrom/My Unit | Reflet | Robin, Denis | Donnel/Velvet | Panne, Eliwood/Ninian (Fire Emblem), Guire | Gaius/Tiamo | Cordelia, Ike/Senerio | Soren, Jaffar/Nino (Fire Emblem), Jeritza von Hrym/My Unit | Byleth, Joker | Jakob/My Unit | Kamui | Corrin, Lazward | Laslow/Marx | Xander, Leon | Leo/Odin/Zero | Niles, Liz | Lissa/Lon'qu, Marth (Fire Emblem)/Meta Knight, Olivia/Viaur | Virion, Serge | Cherche/Sumia, Soiree | Sully/Sort | Stahl
Series: Serpi's FEHverse [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2196012
Comments: 5
Kudos: 5





	1. Class Notes

**Author's Note:**

> I liked this setting so much that I decided to make it a stand-alone story from "Gloria". Since that fic has gotten pretty out of date, anyway (major shifts in who's with whom and which kids are around), I decided to do this, instead. This is just silliness, ripped fresh from my brain. My head-canon is weird, so don't be afraid to click that back button if I lose you somewhere. Between the A/O dynamics, the odd ships, and Meta Knight, I don't expect this to have a very wide appeal. But I like it, and I'm gonna post it.
> 
> I like to write for a lot of different characters, but of course, Priam and Ike and Soren are my favorites. I will dote on them quite a bit, here. Ike/Soren is kinda my obsession. And Marth/Meta Knight... Well, that's a long story. Sit back and suspend your disbelief for a while, because here we go!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I switched this chapter to the front, simply because I love it so much. I guess you could say that this story is now out of chronological order, but... Oh, well!

It was a quiet day in class, and for once, that was not cause for suspicion. The children didn’t often take written examinations, but occasionally, Byleth liked to gauge their level of comprehension. He assigned classroom essays now and then, partly to keep them on their toes, but mainly to give himself a break.

The usual winter illness had been circulating, and Byleth’s sore throat told him that it was time for a pop quiz. And so, after the usual amount of moaning and groaning, the students settled in to write their papers, being told that if they turned in suitable material, they would be released for the day.

Priam was halfway into his first paragraph when a scrap of paper slid over his notes.

_Shiro: Hey, look over here!_

Priam looked. Shiro was sitting beside him, a grin on his face and green streaks in his hair. Priam’s eyebrows rose. He wrote back, sliding the note across the table.

_Priam: What’s that in your hair?_

_Shiro: I dyed it! Cool, huh?_

_Priam: Where’d you get hair dye?_

_Shiro: Severa!_

Priam glanced up at the red-headed girl in front of him.

_Priam: Think she’d do mine? I want blood-red tips like the warriors in the Flame Tribe._

_Shiro: I dunno, ask her._

Priam tore a new sheaf of paper and scribbled on it quickly.

_Priam: Hey, could you dye my hair?_

He folded the note and flicked it, but it landed far from its target, bouncing off of the table edge to skid across the table next to Severa’s. Ophelia picked up the note and frowned at it before writing on it and tossing it back.

_Ophelia: You want to change the natural color of your locks? Why?_

Groaning, Priam wrote back and flicked the note again. This time, it hit Severa’s head. She looked around until she found the note, and unfolded it.

_Priam: I wasn’t talking to you!_

Severa scowled at the cryptic message. She wasn’t sure whom it was for, but she wrote back a succinct reply before handing it back:

_Severa: Shove off, ugly!_

_Priam: No, I wanted you to dye my hair for me! I wand red tips like blood._

This time, the note landed on Lucina’s elbow.

_Lucina: Stop passing notes! The teacher will have your head!_

_Priam: I didn’t mean to throw it at you, snotface._

_Lucina: I’m telling on you!_

Priam read this with a smirk, and showed it to Shiro.

_Shiro: Then you’ll get in trouble, too! Your writing’s on this note, LUCINA._

_Lucina: Oh, go soak your heads, both of you!_

This reply was crumpled up and tossed over her shoulder, landing between Shiro and Priam.

_Priam: Ha, we made her mad!_

_Shiro: When are you gonna ask her out, anyway?_

Priam balked.

_Priam: WHAT? I am not going to ask her out! I don’t like her!_

_Shiro: Methinks you protest too much._

_Priam: Now you’re sounding like Ophelia._

Shiro grinned and tore a new paper from his book. This time, he tossed the note to the desk next to theirs.

_Shiro: Priam likes Lucina! Pass this on!_

Soleil giggled, and tossed the note across the empty seat to the desk next to hers. Gerome scowled at it before sliding it across the desk to Nina. She read it, shook her head, and then wrote a fresh note on her own paper. Tossing it to the next desk, she hid her self-satisfied smirk behind her hands as Inigo read the note.

_Nina: Priam likes Shiro! Pass it on!_

He frowned, and wrote back:

_Inigo: Are you sure?_

_Nina: Just pass it on._

_Inigo: I just don’t think Priam and Shiro are dating._

Nina huffed silently, glancing up at the teacher’s desk. Byleth was absorbed in a book.

_Nina:_ **_PRIAM AND SHIRO ARE SO TOGETHER THEY ARE IN LOVE!_ **

The force of her writing could have scarred the desk. Inigo, cowed, passed the note to Dwyer, who gave it a cursory glance before tossing it to Shigure in front of him in the next row. Shigure didn’t even get a chance to look at it before Kanako snatched it and read over it with delight. She reached under the desks and waved it in Kana’s field of vision.

Kana read it, and then passed it to Cynthia, who wrote a reply and turned around to give it directly to Nina.

_Cynthia: NO WAY! Priam and Shiro?_

_Nina: Yeah, they are kissing in secret!_

_Cynthia: Priam and Shiro are secret boyfriends!_

She threw this note to Forrest at the next desk. He and Ophelia both read it between them.

_Forrest: Good for them! Priam and Shiro are together._

_Ophelia: May the stars bless their union!_

It was then passed to Severa. She snorted and sent the reply back to Ophelia.

_Severa: Priam and Shiro, together? I’ll believe it when pigs fly._

_Ophelia: Look you to the sky, then, and behold the winged swine!_

Priam had been watching the circulation of this note with some worry. He glanced at Shiro, who was still grinning at him. Frowning, he tore a fresh paper and sent a note to Severa.

_Priam: Look, I do NOT like Lucina! Pass it on!_

_Severa: Really? I guess it’s true, then. Everyone already knows. Congrats, I guess._

_Priam: Congrats on what?_

_Severa: You and Shiro, dumbass!_

_Priam: What about me and Shiro?_

Rolling her eyes, Severa sent the first note back to him. Priam’s face fell. He tore yet another sheet of paper, scribbled furiously, folded it, and wrote Nina’s name on the outside in bold letters. Shiro conveyed it to Soleil, who sent it to Gerome, who growled and slapped it in front of Nina. She waited until Byleth’s searching eyes were back on his book before reading it.

_Priam: I DO NOT LIKE SHIRO! SCREW YOU, NINA!_

_Nina: Oooh, such a bad word! Did you learn it from Shiro?_

The reply was sent back through the chain.

_Priam: FUCK OFF!_

This time, instead of giving the note to Nina, Gerome wrote on it himself and passed it back to Soleil to give to Shiro and Priam.

_Gerome: The next person who passes me a note: I’m going to send it straight to the teacher._

Shiro scoffed.

_Shiro: Yeah, Lucina tried that, but your writing is now part of it, too, GEROME._

_Gerome: Go to hell._

This reply didn’t reach its intended recipient; Nina snatched the paper and wrote on it.

_Nina: OK, but seriously. You guys. Tell me you’re NOT totally together._

Shiro frowned.

_Shiro: Who?_

_Nina: You and Priam!_

_Shiro: No way! Eat shit, Nina!_

_Nina: I have sooooo much evidence to get you in trouble! You and Priam both cursed!_

_Shiro: So?_

_Nina: I’ll tell your parents if you two don’t kiss each other at the end of class!_

Incredulous, Shiro showed the note to Priam. Priam wrote his response with a deadly serious face, scarily reminiscent of his father’s.

_Priam: Nina, this is a promise. I’m gonna kill you._

_Nina: Kiss or die!_

_Shiro: That’s blackmail! You can’t do that! I’ll tell your parents, too!_

_Nina: Ma would be proud of me, so there._

_Shiro: What about your dads?_

_Nina: I think they would be proud of me, too. Ophelia, wouldn’t Dad and Papa be proud of me for blackmailing Shiro and Priam into kissing each other?_

She passed this to Ophelia in front of her.

_Ophelia: Our parents are masters of sneaky-ness. You apply their lessons well, my sister!_

_Nina: Read it and weep, dork!_

This time, she flicked it towards Shiro and Priam directly.

_Priam: Go ahead and tell my parents! Mom curses all the time. He won’t care! Mercenaries curse, and if you nobles don’t like it, then you can suck my nuts!_

_Nina: Or you could suck Shiro’s nuts. That would be SO HOT._

_Shiro: You have a disease!_

_Nina: It’s called PASSION!_

_Shiro: You know who’s really hot together? Keaton and Kaden._

_Nina: Nice try. Pucker up, buttercup!_

Dismayed, Shiro put his head in his hands. Priam leaned over to write:

_Priam: Just let her tell._

_Shiro: My dad will kill me if he hears that I was cursing!_

_Priam: At least your mom won’t smother you with her giant boobs._

_Shiro: Take that back, asshole!_

_Priam: Take what back? Your mom’s tits are gigantic. You can’t say I’m wrong._

_Shiro: Stop talking about my mom’s boobs!_

What followed was a crude doodle of a woman with breasts so large that her head could not be seen at all.

The blow came instantly, but Priam was ready for it. He leaned back in his chair to dodge Shiro’s punch and countered with a hit of his own across Shiro’s shoulder. “THAT’S it!” Shiro shouted aloud, lunging for Priam and knocking him out of his chair, toppling both chairs to the floor.

“Hey, HEY! Stop that!” Byleth sprang to his feet, rushing to break up the fight.

Nina was bouncing in her seat. She hastily wrote a note to Kana, squealing out loud.

_Nina: OH MY GODS THEY ARE SO TOGETHER LOOK AT THEIR PASSION!_

Kana looked over at Priam and Shiro, who were fighting like rabid wolverines.

_Kana: I think you have a problem, Nina._

Her delighted squeals followed Shiro and Priam out into the hall as Byleth dragged them, kicking and shouting, from the room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, I appreciate the irony of someone like me writing for Nina.
> 
> Also, writing this brought back a boatload of nostalgia for me. I attended school back when we tossed little paper triangles (we called them 'footballs') at each other to communicate. Texting wasn't a thing back then, though I remember that some of the richer students had cell phones by the time we got to high school. 
> 
> ... I am so old...


	2. 21 to Doom

_Welcome! Come on in, you must be tired. Just take your boots off at the door, please. Don’t worry, they’ll be returned to you. Felicia takes excellent care of everyone’s footwear._

_Come along, then. I’ll show you to the library. It’s so nice of your summoner to send you! I always enjoy visitors. Well, not always, I_ am _a little reclusive. But you know what I-- What? Oh, we do have a lot of heroes here. This castle had to be built to accommodate them all. Yeah, I oversaw the construction myself. Beautiful, isn’t it? I don’t like to brag, but—_

 _Hm? Oh, yes, we actually do have quite a few children running around! Don’t mind them. We’re starting up a formal education program, to keep them corralled and busy during the day. Yep, that_ is _Lucina. She’s a bit smaller than the one at your summoner’s castle, right? Things are a little different here! I wanted people to be content staying here for a while, so I bent the rules just a bit. Do you have a version of Chrom back home? I see. He’d maybe like to come visit sometime!_

 _Oh, no, that’s not Ike – that’s his son, Priam. Hm? What_ about _Soren? He’s Priam’s mother, you know._

_What’s with that face? Hehe! I told you I bent the rules! Here, we operate on an alpha/omega dynamic. Everybody was assigned a secondary sex when they were summoned. I thought it would make things interesting. Loki was a huge help…_

_How does it work? Well, I could explain, but we’d be here all day. If you want to know more, there are some books in the library…_

_Depraved? Hey, you’re acting like I’m some mad scientist! I just like to play around with expectations, that’s all. My heroes are happy, so that’s all that matters to me._

_Oh, him? That’s Meta Knight. He’s from the World of Smash – Yeah, the same one Roy always talks about! You have a Roy at home, too, then? How old is he? The one here is a bit younger than he ought to be, but he has his parents with him, so…_

_What? Oh, no, I summoned Meta Knight using a different ritual. It’s called the Wish-Fulfilment Pact. Your summoner might know… Yeah, I brought him here to be with Marth, actually! Hm? With Caeda? Oh, we don’t have her here in Castle Gloria. No, I never summoned her. Well, I may have, but I really needed her skills… Ahem, anyway, here we go! This is the library, the pride of Castle Gloria! I love books. This place has information on just about everything you could—Oh, yes, they started their own little family. I summoned Kirby here, and they sort of adopted him a few years ago. Marth is an omega, so I guess they could have biological children, but they’re happy with—What do you mean, ‘sick’? We’re all quite healthy, thank you._

_Why are you looking at me like that? Oh, worried about your own bits? It’s understandable— No, no, it’s alright! I understand. Don’t worry, you won’t be affected. Well, unless you were to be summoned here, yourself. But that’s—_

_Hey, where are you going? Didn’t you come to see the library?_

_Come back!_

_You forgot your shoes!_

>>><<<

“Are you sure this is a good idea?”

Soren and Priam both looked to Ike; Soren with a raised eyebrow, Priam with a glint of hope. Ike shrugged his shoulders and folded his arms on the table. “I mean, Mist and I never went to school. Not a formal school, at least. We turned out fine.”

“Ike, this will keep the children occupied while we tend to our duties.” Soren’s red eyes narrowed just slightly. “Are you volunteering to hang back from the front lines to watch Priam?”

Avoiding his son’s hopeful gaze, Ike said, “No, but I don’t know how this is gonna work. I’ve never heard of a class where everyone learns together.”

“Individual tutoring would be ideal, but…” Soren tapped his finger against his chin. “Well, it can’t really be helped. It’s this or nothing.”

“I was learning just fine from you,” Priam said sulkily.

“This is not up for discussion. You’re going, and that’s that.” Soren’s tone discouraged argument, but Priam persisted.

“I don’t want to!”

“Life is full of things that you don’t want to do, Priam. Besides, this will teach you social skills – Goddess knows that your father and I can’t…”

“Mo-ooom!”

“That’s enough! I won’t hear another word about it.”

Priam’s mouth snapped shut, but he was far from done with his protest. He looked to Ike beseechingly, his eyes wide and pleading. Ike just shook his head. “If your mother says that it’s a good thing, then you’re going,” he said, and Priam’s imploring look became a scowl. “I know you can do it, Priam. You even know these other kids; you’ve grown up with them.”

“Yeah, doesn’t mean I like ‘em…”

“You play with people you don’t like?”

Caught in a lie, Priam’s only defense was to slump in his chair. Soren shifted through the papers that he’d brought back from the meeting, and Ike patted Priam on the shoulder. “Don’t worry, son. You’ll be fine. Byleth’s a good guy, and he seems to know his stuff.”

“Byleth can suck it…” Priam muttered, prompting his mother to slap the table.

“That’s ‘ _Professor_ Byleth’ to you, as of next week! If you cause any trouble in this class, I’ll let your grandfather decide how to punish you!” 

Greil was a far more doting grandfather than he was a father, but he was still strict, and Priam knew it. He shuddered. “Yes, sir…”

“Using Dad like that… You must be serious,” Ike said after Priam had left the table.

“I am.” Soren skimmed the class schedule. “Priam needs to learn how to show respect, because we certainly can’t teach him that.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

Soren gave him a look. “Ike, you called the empress of Begnion a brat. You’ve threatened half of the Begnion senate. And I once told the crown prince of Gallia to jump off a cliff – which he did, if only to prove that he could. Priam needs better role models when it comes to navigating social situations.”

“What if he turns out like us, anyway?”

“Then at least we can say that we tried.”

That left Ike with something to think about, as Soren gathered up the papers and went to file them appropriately.

>>><<<

“Oh, what’s all this?” Chrom had to pause at the doorway to his chambers; the sitting area was strewn with books, notebooks, loose papers, quills, inkwells, and charcoal sticks. His children were sitting among the mess, apparently sorting through it and choosing things to stuff into their satchels. Robin was sitting in a chair nearby, overseeing them. She smiled as Chrom entered.

“We’re getting school supplies ready,” the mage said. “They’ll be starting next week, and they’re very excited!”

“Look, Daddy, I got some blue charcoals!” Morgan said, waving his treasures around proudly.

“I see!” Chrom chuckled and moved to step around the clutter. He sat next to Robin on the sofa, giving her a quick peck on the cheek.

“Daddy, did you ever go to school?” Lucina asked.

“Well, we had private tutors,” Chrom said. “But I learned alongside my younger sister, so it was… a bit like this, I suppose.”

“I’m gonna get the best grades,” Morgan said proudly. “Mom told us that we get grades to show how well we’re doing. Mine are gonna be the best.”

“I’m sure they will be, if you’re even half as smart as your mother!” Chrom said heartily. To Robin, he said, “Did you get a chance to go over the syllabus?”

“Yes, I did,” she said. “It looks solid to me. Byleth really knows how to pull together a lesson plan.”

“I’m not surprised; he’s used to teaching much more advanced students than our kids.”

“Hmph. I’m advanced,” Morgan said.

“Morgan, don’t be a braggart,” Lucina chided him. “You’re a prince; you’re supposed to be humble.”

“I know…”

“Well, I hope that both of you do your best,” Robin said. “You’re both so smart; I want you to apply yourselves and really earn those good grades.”

“Yes, Mommy!” both children said in unison, and continued packing their things.

Chrom pulled Robin to rest against him. “Look at them… They’re so excited! I hope they have fun.”

“I hope so, too,” Robin said. “I think it’ll be a great opportunity for them. They’ll learn social skills and cooperation along with the basic lessons.”

“Hey, I wanted the purple one!” Morgan reached over to snatch the quill from Lucina’s grip. Lucina held it out of his reach.

“I got it first. You can have the green one.”

“I don’t want green!”

“Well, I don’t want it.”

“Gimme that!”

Chrom and Robin both sighed as their sweet, diplomatic children began grappling over a pen.

>>><<<

It was said that one should never try to live vicariously through one’s children; that each child was a person in his or her own right and was not to be made in the image of the parent. But Forrest, Nina, and Ophelia were their parents’ children, and sometimes, it was as if they were their parents in miniature.

There were three factions in this debate: Leo and Forrest thought that formal education was a fine idea. Odin and Ophelia balked at the restrictive nature of a classroom setting. And Niles and Nina, while appearing to be neutral, were set on playing both ends against each other.

“We’ll learn lots of things,” Forrest reassured his little sister, taking her hand in his and patting it.

Ophelia was not impressed. Nor was their papa. “I don’t want to waste my days in confinement!” she sighed.

“Children should run free, and learn through the examples of their parents,” said Odin. “Why, my youthful days were spent frolicking in the meadows with my cousins, learning the tales of old, nary a thought spared to the stuffy bookrooms of the—”

“How’d you learn to read, then, Papa?” Nina asked innocently.

“Oh, well, er…” Odin blushed, and scratched his cheek. “I suppose I did spend some time with a tutor… But that wasn’t in a classroom! We learned outdoors, under the vast expanse of—”

“It’s only four hours a day, four days a week,” Leo reasoned. “That is certainly more lenient by far than the rigorous tutelage of my youth.”

“But you _enjoy_ spending time with your nose in a book,” Niles said.

“I want to spend my days basking in the glory of youth!” Ophelia whined, quoting her father almost verbatim from an earlier argument on this same topic.

“Enough,” Leo said. “The three of you are going to attend. That’s final.”

“After all, it’ll do you some good to learn how to endure boredom,” Niles said, and Leo shot him a glare.

“I’m quite looking forward to it,” said Forrest. “I enjoy learning new things!”

“Me, too,” said Nina. “I think it’ll be fabulous to be alone in a room with a stranger!”

Leo’s jaw twitched as Ophelia clapped a hand to her mouth. “Father, he _is_ a stranger!” she said, fixing her wide gray eyes on him.

“We know Byleth well enough,” said Leo, patting down her golden curls.

“I’m sure he won’t _think_ about kidnapping us for ransom,” said Nina, a wicked glint in her eye.

“You’ve been reading too many adventure novels,” Leo scoffed, but Ophelia was looking at him now in horror.

“I trust him, as well,” said Odin. “Rest assured that he’s on our side.”

“I don’t know, I’m leaning a bit more towards Odin’s side,” said Niles. “If the children are free to roam around, then we won’t need to worry about scheduling our time. They can stay with us _all day long_.”

At the implication, Odin’s face fell. “I hadn’t thought about that…” he mumbled, his cheeks reddening. “Maybe it would be OK if they spent a few hours away… Just sometimes.”

“Ew, no, I don’t want to stay here all the time!” Nina balked, defecting from the neutral side to join her father. “I’m not a baby!”

“Wait, but I _would_ like to spend all day with you,” Forrest said, hesitantly leaning towards his mother.

“Kidnappers!” Ophelia cried. “Kidnappers and pirates!”

Leo groaned. This was going to take all night.

>>><<<

Byleth sighed as he looked over the stack of papers on his desk. Twenty-one. There were twenty-one forms in the stack, each bearing a parent’s signature at the end of a long and detailed description of Byleth’s expectations for the class. Twenty-one were the children who were going to be in his class.

Twenty-one was the number that labeled his doom.


	3. Hard Lessons

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The dawn of the First Day...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is mostly the same as the story I wrote for "Gloria", but changed to reflect the changes in my head-canon.

It wasn’t fair. Byleth sat at his desk, his chin resting on his folded hands, surveying the chaos that was to be his world for the next four hours. Why did he have to do this? Sure, he was an experienced instructor; but that didn’t mean he had any desire to teach… (he shuddered) children.

Yet here they were, all gathered in a small sunlit room that had been repurposed as a classroom. The little hellions were already doing their damnedest to wreck the place – climbing on the desks, pulling books off of shelves, tying the draperies into knots. Byleth’s nose wrinkled as he spied a mystery stain on the blue carpet. He didn’t even _want_ to know how that got there. He glanced at the clock hanging by the door; three minutes before he could put an end to it. Until then, he was determined not to speak a single word to any of them. He wasn’t here by choice, so the least he could do for himself was to nurture his sanity while he could.

“Teacher, are we starting yet?” young Tiki asked.

“Noooo, I don’t wanna!” Nina groaned, slumping onto the floor.

“Stop that at once,” Siegbert admonished his cousin.

“ _You_ stop it,” she shot back.

“I- stop what?”

Byleth let out a deep sigh. It simply wasn’t fair.

There was a commotion in the corridor, just beyond sight of the open doorway. “I’m not going!” a child’s voice, shrill and angry.

“This is not up for debate.” And a male adult, even angrier. “Now, get in there and keep your mouth shut until the end of class.”

“I don’t WANNA!”

“Priam, I swear I will turn your legs to stone!”

“You can try!”

Apparently, Soren did try. There was a scuffle, a scream, and then Priam came streaking into the room, diving for the safety of one of the desks by the window. Soren came into view soon after, his eyes flashing dangerously. “Hello, Byleth.” His gaze never left his son. “Priam, I don’t want to hear of any mischief. Understood?”

Priam groaned. “Yes, sir…”

Soren nodded, satisfied, and gave Byleth a pitying glance as he left. Byleth couldn’t help feeling just a bit patronized.

As the clock struck eight, a chime sounded from within, a lilting melody that effectively put an end to much of the chatter in the room. Byleth stood, crossed to the door, and closed it with a finality that stopped the rest of the conversation. His steps thudded on the wooden floor as he made his way back to his desk. Then, surveying the room carefully, he said: “Class will now begin. Take your seats.”

There was a scuffling and scraping as the children fought for desks. Byleth noted that they were all seated fairly quickly. Apparently, Soren hadn’t been the only parent to threaten retribution for bad behavior. He cleared his throat and forged on with renewed determination. “Welcome to the first day of school. My name is Professor Byleth. I will now call roll. As your name is called, answer ‘present’ and I will mark you for attendance.” Keeping his instructions clear and concise seemed to be the best strategy with children, he thought. At least they were paying attention.

Cynthia was first; the daughter of Cherche and Sumia, as Byleth understood. The girl who answered “Here!” was a slight little thing, with mousy hair tied into jaunty pigtails.

Dwyer answered next, with a groan and a, “Yeah.” The female Corrin’s son exuded an air of laziness that surprised Byleth. His father, Jakob, was less a butler and more a force of nature, always on point and always diligent. Mentally, Byleth began to tally up the trouble students. This kid was practically lying on his desk. Obviously, a problem.

Forrest was a bouncy little boy, and he answered enthusiastically when called. It took a moment for Byleth to realize that it was, indeed, a boy. The pink frock he wore threw the professor off momentarily. But he was bright-eyed and attentive, and so Byleth filed him into the Not-A-Problem folder.

Gerome was the next child to go into the Problem category. Cynthia’s little brother was sullen and hardly answered when called. He glared challengingly at Byleth, and Byleth glared right back until the redheaded child looked away, his cheeks dusted pink.

Inigo’s answer was also reticent, but Byleth had been expecting this. His mother, Olivia, had written a note on his form that said, “Please excuse my son for his shyness. He is really a very sweet boy, even if you have some trouble getting him to talk in front of the class.” Byleth had fought alongside Olivia before, so he knew from whom Inigo got this shyness.

The two Kanas answered at the same time, and the female variant giggled when she realized it. “I guess you’ll call me Kanako, too,” she said to Byleth, and he agreed. It was just less confusing that way. He added “ko” to the end of the second “Kana” on his list. It was remarkable that the two were not technically related; they looked almost exactly alike, except that the girl’s hair was pulled back into a messy bun.

Kirby answered with “Poyo!”, which took Byleth aback for a moment. The sincerity of the pink-haired boy’s smile indicated that he wasn’t trying to mock Byleth, so Byleth let it slide. He supposed it was a word from whatever language was spoken in his native land. Marth and Meta Knight had adopted Kirby as a very small child, but he was perhaps still learning.

Kjelle was as stern-looking as her mother, the knight Sully. Byleth hoped that she would prove to be as easygoing as her father; Stahl was a steadfast warrior, but quite agreeable. As he called her name, though, her sharp little voice held all of her mother’s intensity.

Lucina and Morgan both answered “Present” as if they had been instructed to. Byleth put them into the Not-A-Problem category. They both seemed eager to learn.

Nina was a different story. She was sitting under her desk.

“Nina?” Byleth called again, looking around, until one of the other children – he hadn’t gotten to his name yet – pointed to the empty desk. Byleth bent so he could see the girl hiding there. “Nina, do you want to come and join the rest of the class?”

“No,” she said. There was a smattering of giggles from the other students. Byleth sighed.

“I suppose I’ll just get your father, then,” he said.

With a scowl, Nina returned to her seat. Byleth labeled her Troublemaker 1.

Ophelia and Owain could have been twins, though they were a year apart in age. They both answered with a flourish. “It is I, Ophelia Dusk, daughter of the great hero Odin Dark, of the noble Prince Leo, of the scandalous stalker Niles! Wielder of…”

“Owain at your service! Prince, swordsman, keeper of the castle, protector of the playground…”

Priam, whom Byleth had met before, only glared when his name was called. Meet Troublemaker 2, Byleth thought. He finally answered with a grudging, “Yeah, I’m here,” when Byleth repeated his name.

Severa was a short and simple, “Yup.” For a girl who wore so many glittery ribbons in her hair, she was quite sour faced. Her eyes were as sharp as a hawk’s.

Shigure turned out to be the blue-haired boy who hadn’t spoken a word since entering the classroom. Even his answer, “Present,” was as quiet as a spring breeze. It was refreshing, Byleth thought with a shake of his head.

Shiro wasn’t there.

Byleth called, but the other children only looked around. He hadn’t expected to have an absent student on the very first day, but he shrugged and marked his name off on the list.

Siegbert was the boy who had pointed Nina out, and Byleth recognized him as one of Xander’s children. He seemed calm and sensible; Byleth made a mental note to appoint him class representative. His sister, Soleil, sat next to him with a big smile on her face. Byleth hoped that Siegbert’s influence would keep her in check, too.

The last to be called was Tiki. As the young dragon answered, “I’m here, and ever so excited to begin!” the door opened and in rushed a brunette boy who was puffing and panting. He dashed to the empty desk next to Priam. “Sorry, sorry, I woke up late!” he gasped.

“You would be Shiro, I presume?” Byleth asked.

“Yeah, that’s me.”

“Hm.” Byleth wrote “late” next to Shiro’s name and set down the list. He decided to forge ahead with the lesson – an admonition for tardiness could come later. “Alright, then. Let’s begin with a basic assessment of your general knowledge. You are all at roughly the same age, but your education up to this point has been unstructured.”

“Our parents were doing OK,” Severa said sulkily.

“… Be that as it may,” Byleth said, “your parents all agreed that this would be far more efficient. While they are busy on the battlefield, they can be assured that you’re receiving an education.” And free babysitting, he thought, but he wasn’t going to harp on that too much. “Now, show of hands - how many of you know how to read and write?”

He was fairly surprised when most of the children raised their hands. “I only know how to read and write in the dragon language,” Tiki said, “but Mar-Mar is teaching me.”

“Not bad,” Byleth said, his eyebrows raised slightly. “Then, let’s have a little quiz, shall we?”

“What’s a quiz?” Shiro asked.

“Raise your hand if you have a question.”

“Oh. What’s a quiz?” The boy still didn’t raise his hand. Byleth sighed.

“I told you to raise your hand, Shiro.”

Shiro shrugged. “Why? You already know I’ve got a question to ask. Can’t you just answer?”

“I cannot, until you learn to follow classroom protocol.”

“But, Teacher!” Soleil chimed in, her hand waving in the air. “You just answered his other question, and he didn’t have his hand up!”

Byleth had to resist the urge to face-palm. “Let’s start again. Class rules.” He turned to the blackboard that had been installed on the wall beside his desk and took up a piece of chalk. Writing out as he spoke, he said, “Rule 1: No talking during class time except when instructed to by the teacher. Rule 2: Raise your hand and wait to be acknowledged before asking a question. Rule 3…” He paused, considering, then set down the chalk. “To be determined.” He turned back to the children. “This is a learning curve for all of us. I’ve never taught children before, and you have never attended a formal class. I don’t know yet what rules we need to follow, so we’ll just have to learn together.”

“Ooh, ooh, can I be the teacher?” Shiro asked, bouncing in his seat.

“No. And raise your hand before asking something!”

Shiro shrugged, and Byleth reminded himself that the use of weapons wasn’t generally part of a teacher’s lesson plan. “Now, then. Let’s have a quiz. A quiz is a short test. I’ll ask you questions, and we’ll see how well you can answer them. You won’t receive a grade for this, but I’d like to assess your general knowledge.”

Siegbert raised his hand, and Byleth gave a small prayer of thanks for small blessings. “Yes, uh, Siegbert?”

“What kinds of things will we learn here? My father has been teaching me about Nohrian history, but you’re not from Nohr, so…” His face flushed pink, as if he were suddenly embarrassed to be speaking. Byleth gave him an indulgent smile. He seemed a well-spoken young man.

“A good question. Here you will learn to read and to write, as well as about general arithmetic and Askran history. These are things that everybody should learn while they’re young, before they start to learn a trade. I’ll teach you language and math, and we’ll have a guest teacher to instruct us all on Askr’s history and culture. We will also go over general knowledge such as how things in nature work.”

“Won’t we be learning any combat skills?” Lucina asked with her hand in the air.

“No, not here,” Byleth said. “Your parents will handle your martial training as they have before. And in the future, wait to be acknowledged before you ask your questions.”

Lucina nodded, blushing.

“Now, are there any more questions?”

“Me, me!” Soleil said, waving her hand.

“Yes, Soleil?”

“My dad says there’s a girl version of you, like with Kana and Kanako. Is she cute?”

Byleth stared at the girl blankly. “Any other questions?” he said after a moment. “None? Good. Let us begin the quiz.”

Clearing his throat, he grabbed the roster from his desk before proceeding. “Kirby. If I have five apples, and give you two of them, how many apples have I left?”

Kirby looked around, bemused. “I don’t see any apples, poyo.”

“It’s a theoretical question,” Byleth said. “Imagine that I have five apples. Let’s count them.” He took five coins from his pocket and laid them out on his desk. “One, two, three, four, five. Now, I give you two.” He took two coins away. “How many are left?”

“Those are coins, not apples,” Kirby said. This time, Byleth did face-palm.

“OK. Fine. If I have five COINS, and I give you two…”

“Hey, he’s getting money?” Kana protested.

“I want money!” Shiro said.

“Nobody said we were getting paid for this!” Soleil said, perking up.

“It’s only theory!” Byleth said. “We’re only pretending! Now, then. How many coins do I have on the desk, Kirby?”

“Three,” the boy said. “Does that mean you’re giving me two coins?”

“No. I am not giving you any coins.” Byleth pocketed the currency, deciding against using it in future math questions. It seemed that some of the children were far too literal in their thinking. “Alright, let’s see… Who’s next…”

“Me, me!” Severa waved her hand in the air. “I want money!”

“No! Nobody is getting money!” Byleth snapped, and there was a general groan among the class. “Now, Inigo. How many seasons are in a year?”

“Ummmmmm…” Inigo thought about this for a moment, his gaze trailing outside. “Four…?”

“That’s right. There are four seasons in a year – spring, summer, autumn, and winter.” Byleth could have hugged the boy. “Kana, each letter has two forms: a small form and a larger form. What is the larger form called?”

“A big letter?” Kana said.

“Wrong. Kanako?”

“A capital!” the dragon girl said confidently, giving Kana a haughty smirk when Byleth confirmed her answer.

“That’s not fair, I want a do-over!” Kana said.

“No, you’re not getting a do-over,” Byleth said. “Who can tell me what the liquid form of ice is?”

“Ice!” Kana shouted.

“Wrong.”

“Dammit!”

“It’s water,” Shigure said, holding his hand up shyly. Byleth nodded to him.

“Excellent. Morgan, how many types of magic are there?”

“Um… We don’t know,” Morgan said uncertainly. “My mother says we don’t know for sure how many types of magic exist, because we’re still discovering new things about it all the time.”

“Marvelous answer!” Byleth was feeling a little more optimistic now. These children were more intelligent than he’d given them credit for. “Now, what color would you get if you mixed blue and yellow together? Let’s have Nina answer.” He waited, but the girl was in the middle of whispering to her sister. “Nina, pay attention. Did you hear what I said?”

“Oh,” Nina snapped to attention. “Um, no. I didn’t hear you.”

“That’s a wrong answer for you, then,” Byleth said disapprovingly. “Those who don’t pay attention won’t get far in my class.”

“Does that mean I get to go home?” Nina asked.

Byleth chose to ignore her. “Ophelia, can you tell me what the answer is?”

The youngest student smiled sweetly. “Chicken butt!” she said without any trace of shame. The class erupted in laughter.

“What did you…?” Byleth’s gaze fell to Nina, who was looking to the front with a far-too-innocent expression. It reminded Byleth of Claude. “Nina, did you tell her to say that?”

“N- no,” Nina said, faltering for a moment. That was all the confirmation that Byleth needed.

A minute later, Nina was standing in the back corner of the room, and Byleth had quieted the class again. “Alright, then. Owain, let’s say we have five…” His hand paused on its way to his pocket, and he reached instead for the chalk. He drew five apples on the board. “We have five apples. Now, I add five more.” He drew the additional shapes. “How many do we have?”

“Hmm…” Owain considered this for a moment. “Are they poisoned apples? How can you tell that some villain hasn’t tampered with them?”

“Wh- what?” Byleth blinked. “No, they’re… They’re not poisoned.”

Owain gasped dramatically. “Are they enchanted apples? What kind of powers would I get from eating one? Are they sent by the gods?!”

“I… No, they’re just… How many apples are on the board, Owain?!”

“Oh, ten. But would they grant immortal life? Maybe they give some sort of mystical insight!”

Ophelia was clapping her hands and cheering, but the other children seemed just as confused as Byleth was. He erased the apples, perplexed, and turned to the class once more. “Right, then. Priam, what is a synonym?”

Priam’s face was stoic. “It’s a word.”

Byleth’s eyebrow twitched. “Yes, but what kind of word?”

“A Common Language one.”

“Priam, what does the word ‘synonym’ mean?”

Priam frowned seriously. “Well, sir, I suppose it could mean a lot of things to different people. We all think different things are important.”

Byleth walked over to Priam’s desk, leaning on it so that their gazes were nearly level. “Do you want to stand in the corner with Nina?”

“No, sir.”

“Then stop fooling around. Understood?”

“Yes, sir.” The corner of Priam’s mouth twitched. Byleth scowled at him as he stepped back.

“Alright. Who can tell me what a synonym is?”

“A synonym is a word that means the same thing as another word,” Shigure said, earning an approving nod from Byleth.

“Good. Shiro, what is 34 rounded to the nearest ten?”

“Uh… ten!”

“Incorrect. Siegbert, would you care to answer?”

“Thirty?”

“That’s right. Now, Soleil, what is one half of twelve?”

“Hm. Well, half of ten is five… So, half of twelve is… six?”

“Correct!” Byleth clapped his hands together and leaned back on the desk. “Nina, you may return to your seat. You all did better in general than I had dared to hope. Now, then, let’s start today’s lesson.”

“Can you believe this?” Priam muttered to Shiro as Nina sat on the prince’s other side. “Why did our parents have to send us to this guy?”

“I dunno, maybe they want to bore us to death,” Shiro replied.

“Tch, yeah, that’s…”

“Boys!” They both fell silent at Byleth’s sharp admonition. “No talking during class time.”

Shiro slumped in his seat, his arms crossed. It wasn’t fair. How could he become a strong warrior if he was stuck inside all day?

When a folded piece of paper was flicked onto his desk, he glanced up to see where it had come from. Nina was sitting with her face turned towards the front, but her eyes peeking at him. He unfolded the paper. _“This is so boring,”_ it said.

“Yeah, it is!” he whispered, and Nina rolled her eyes. Scribbling something else, she tore off another piece of her parchment and handed it to him under the desks.

_“Use your paper, dummy! The teacher can’t hear us talk this way.”_

“O-!” Shiro slapped a hand over his mouth. Then he wrote something below her message and gave it back to her.

_“Oh!”_

Priam was looking over at them, curious, and Shiro wrote something to pass to him. _“Nina says we should send notes, like this.”_

Brightening, Priam hurried to write something down. _“Good idea, Nina. Billy Butt can’t hear us this way.”_ Shiro snickered when he read the message, and then passed it to Nina, who had to hold her hands over her mouth to keep her giggles silent.

 _“Billy Butt! I like that!”_ she wrote back.

 _“Hey, guys, we should form a club! Like a note club or something!”_ Shiro showed this message to Nina and Priam under the desks.

 _“Nah. Let’s talk about stuff we should REALLY be learning,”_ Priam wrote.

 _“We could make an escape plan,”_ Nina replied.

 _“Oh, yeah, let’s do that!”_ Shiro wrote.

 _“I’m gonna pretend to be sick tomorrow.”_ Nina locked gazes with the other two as they nodded in agreement. It was a plan, then.

“Nina! Shiro! Priam!” They snapped to attention immediately. Byleth was looking straight at them. “Were you passing notes in MY class?”

“No, sir,” Priam said.

“What are those scraps of paper?”

“We were taking notes from the board.”

“I see.” Byleth walked between the desks until he got to their row. He took the note from Priam’s hand, and read it. “Priam, what does it say on the board?”

“Uh… I, um… can’t… read it?”

“Out of excuses, are you?” Byleth said dryly. “Lucina, would you care to tell me what it says on the board?”

“It says, ‘Multiplication Tables – 2: 2 x 1 = 2, 2 x 2 = 4, 2 x 3 = 6…”

“Thank you, Lucina. And what does this say?” He gave her the note.

“Use your paper, dummy! The teacher can’t hear us talk this way.” She gave Priam, who was sitting behind her, a haughty look. He glowered at her.

“So, then you might say that your notes are a bit off.”

Shiro and Nina looked at Priam. He shrugged, out of ideas.

“Alright, up you get! Priam, I want you in the front of the room, where I can keep an eye on you.”

“Aww…!”

“Nina, over here by Siegbert.”

“Ugh!”

“Shiro, you stay where you are. Best keep the three of you separate from now on.”

“Humph!”

“Now, we’ll move on to grammar.” Having taken control of the class again, Byleth felt a righteous fire in his chest. He erased the multiplication tables and began writing something else. “Capitalization is a very important principle of communication. If you don’t know which words to capitalize, your sentences can be difficult for others to read. I’m going to write an incorrect sentence, and I’ll have one of you come up and correct it: professor byleth is a teacher of castle gloria.” He scanned the classroom, thinking carefully. “Alright, let’s have Kana.”

At that moment, Nino came to the door. “Oh, sorry to interrupt you! I just needed, um…”

“Oh, yes, of course.” Byleth addressed the class, walking over to Nino, “Stay in your seats, class. I’ll be right back. Now, Nino, already finished that book?”

“Oh, yes, it was great! I’m ready for something more difficult…”

Their voices faded as they walked down the hall, and the silence was soon filled with the chatter of children.

“I like this. I bet we’ll learn a lot!”

“Well, I wanna go home!”

“Me, too…”

“How many more hours til lunch?”

“I can’t believe our parents did this to us!”

“Look at all the books he’s got here! I can’t wait to read them and learn about all the heroes!”

“I’m sooooooo hungry!”

“Did you see what Raigh and Lugh did to the statue outside? _Gross_!”

In the midst of all this talk, Shiro got up from his desk and crept to the front of the room. Nobody noticed that he was erasing and re-writing the sentence on the board. He was back in his seat in a flash, just before Byleth came in and all chatter ceased.

“Alright, settle down. Now, let’s resume. Kana, please correct the sentence.”

Kana rose and picked up a piece of chalk, studying the board carefully. “Um… Sir, you want me to write this?”

“That’s correct,” Byleth said, scanning over the room to make sure everyone was in their proper place.

“OK, then…” The dragon boy wrote the corrected sentence and then stood waiting, rocking back and forth nervously.

“Alright, let’s see.” Byleth inspected the words. Then he blinked. Then he read them again and again. Then he mouthed the words, almost in a state of disbelief. “Professor Butthole is a teacher of Castle Boring.” Kana backed away as Byleth turned his fierce glare onto him. “What is the meaning of this?”

“I think it means you’re a butthole!”

The entire class gasped. Byleth turned, slowly, to see Shiro standing up, matching him glare for glare.

“You can’t keep us here for four hours every day! What kind of crazy person does that?!”

Byleth was beginning to see red. “Your parents elected me to teach you little brats, and I’m going to do it, whether we like it or not. If you have a grievance, take it up with them.”

“But how is this going to help us in battle? Our parents are out there fighting for their lives. I bet you can’t even hold that sword!” Shiro pointed accusingly to the sword at Byleth’s hip.

“… I see.” To everyone’s astonishment, Byleth drew his weapon. “It’s a matter of respect, is it? Very well. You may leave my class, Shiro… IF you can best me in combat.” To hell with the rules, Byleth thought. Sometimes, a lesson had to be learned the hard way.

Shiro felt like the dog that caught the carriage wheel. He didn’t know what to do now that Byleth had actually met his challenge head-on. But with all eyes on him, there was no way he would back down now. “Alright!” His voice was perhaps a bit squeakier than normal, but he was determined not to let his fear show.

“So…” Priam spoke up, breaking the tense silence, his hand in the air. “So, all we have to do is beat you, and we get to skip class? I’m in!”

“Count me in, too!” Soleil said, waving both of her hands.

Byleth smirked. If they wanted a challenge, he would give them one. “Alright, everybody, follow me.” He sheathed the Creator Sword and marched out the door. A hasty scuffling of small feet followed. The children were all stunned into silence, and they walked through the halls in barely-contained excitement, hustling along quickly. Shiro was walking with a determined step, and he puffed up a bit when Nina patted him on the back and Priam flashed him a thumbs-up.

He was going to win this, for all of them.

They emerged into the bright mid-morning sunshine, the crisp air redolent with the scent of an early spring. A few heroes were training in the yard, but they stopped when the class came out of the castle. “Hello, children,” Elincia said cheerfully. “Lord Byleth, well met. I had heard that you were starting up a proper school. What sort of lesson have you planned for this morning?”

“A lesson in respect,” Byleth said, his hand on his sword hilt. Elincia gave a nervous smile.

“Oh, yes, that’s quite important…”

“I think he’s gonna beat the shit out of them,” Cain said with a laugh, and Marth balked at him.

“Cain!”

“Hi, Mar-Mar!” Tiki called.

“Mama!” Kirby waved.

“Oh, hello, children! Are you having fun in class?”

“Teacher’s gonna beat up Shiro!” Kirby said happily, and Marth’s face fell.

The children formed a ring around Byleth and Shiro, who faced off as soon as Shiro had taken up a small training lance and Byleth had selected a sword. “A fair fight,” Byleth said. “No holds barred. Begin.”

As a teacher, Byleth felt it was only fair to allow his student to get in the first hit. Shiro fell into a practiced stance, very like his father’s, and lunged forward with a battle cry that would have been quite fierce were he fully grown. Byleth easily sidestepped him, though. Shiro wheeled around, came at him again, and was again thrown off-balance by his own momentum and the lack of impact.

“Fight back!” Shiro cried, lunging again.

“I don’t need to,” Byleth said calmly. “You’re not even in my league.”

“Coward!”

If I’m such a coward, then hit me!”

But Shiro couldn’t. He darted and dashed and thrust his lance, but he never once landed a hit. Soon he was exhausted, panting and barely able to hold his weapon. Byleth sidestepped another slash, and then reached forward. His finger pushed against Shiro’s head and caught the boy off balance. Shiro went tumbling to the dirt, and Byleth snatched up the training lance, victorious.

Shiro watched him with a flabbergasted look that echoed the expressions of his classmates. With all eyes on him, Byleth tossed the lance upward. With one clean slice of his sword, he had split it in two; the useless wooden pieces fell to the ground with a thud. A gasp made its way through the crowd.

He calmly turned to the children and said, “Anyone else?”

Silence, and the blowing of the wind. Byleth smiled. “Then we’ll return to our classroom.” He put away the training sword and helped Shiro to his feet – the boy was still too stunned to make much sense of anything yet. The children were subdued as they followed their teacher back into the castle.

>>><<<

Despite his righteous fury, Byleth was awash with guilt that night. The children had remained quiet throughout the rest of the lesson, and had left in silence, hardly daring to look at him as he bid them farewell. Shiro had kept his head down all day. Remorse twisted Byleth’s gut as he tossed and turned in his bed. Had he been too hard in humiliating the boy? Had accepting Shiro’s challenge been the right thing to do? Respect was one thing, but he hated to think that his students now thought him a bully.

He was a bit rough around the edges when he reported to class the next day. He almost expected the room to be empty, and to remain so indefinitely – except for a few angry parents. To his surprise, though, the classroom was already full by the time he got there. He glanced at the clock; he was twenty minutes early. The chatter stopped when he appeared, and suddenly he was mobbed by a waist-high crowd of eager faces.

“Hey, Teacher, that was awesome yesterday! Will you show me how to use a sword like that?”

“The way you dodged him was like… Wow! I wanna learn how to do that!”

“Teacher, can we have some class after lunch so we can train?”

“Teacher, look at what I drew! Teacher!”

Slowly, a smile spread across his face. He looked across the group to see Shiro staring up at him. “Um, I’m sorry I was so disrespectful,” the boy said. “I guess I’m not as good as I thought I was…”

He stepped forward and patted Shiro’s shoulder. “I want to help prepare you for whatever might happen in the future,” he said. “I care about you, Shiro. I want to see you succeed. So, will you stay and learn with us?”

The boy brightened. “Yeah, I will.”

“Alright, then.” Byleth felt a great lightening of his heart as he took a seat at his desk. “Well, we have some time before class begins. Does anyone have anything to discuss?”

“Oh! Um, my sister said something about homework?” Morgan said, raising his hand.

“Yes, my mother asked if we had any homework. What is that?” Lucina asked.

“We don’t have homework just yet, but soon you’ll be expected to work on some assignments outside of class time,” Byleth said pleasantly.

It was as if someone had just been stabbed. The room went quiet, and the children’s faces went pale. “You… you’re gonna make us learn even _outside_ of class?” Kanako squeaked.

“Just small assignments,” Byleth said, frowning.

Suddenly, the chatter was back, and this time it was angry.

“What?! How could you do that to us?”

“We trusted you, Teacher!”

“This is our parents’ idea of punishing us, huh?”

“Noooooooooo!”

Byleth sighed, leaning his head on his hands. Just like that, his short-lived tenure as a respected teacher had ended. He was now A Monster once more. Children really were fickle little morons, he thought. “Alright, who do I have to beat to get this to end?” he said at last, when the protests became louder and louder.

“Guys, stop!” Kanako shouted above the din, effectively silencing it. “It’s not his fault. Professor Byleth showed us yesterday that he deserves respect. We’d be idiots to fight him on this.”

“Kanako…” Byleth thought, could it be that some of these kids had some emotional maturity?

“Morgan’s the one who brought up homework,” Kanako continued. “ _He’s_ the one we want!”

“Yeah!” a general cry rose up, and soon Morgan was running for his life as Lucina tried to push the others away. Byleth groaned and fished around his desk drawers for some headache powder.

Day two. It was only day two. He was not going to last.


	4. The New Student

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yarne joins the class, and makes a new friend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I summoned Yarne! So, naturally, I had to add him eventually. I started this story a while back, and finally finished it.

“You’ll do fine, son!”

These words of encouragement made the boy jump. He spun around, fidgeting, bouncing on the balls of his feet. His long ears flopped up and down. Donnel looked down at his son and smiled, his head tilted to the side. “Aw, c’mon, now. Let’s see a ‘lil smile!”

Yarne stopped bouncing, but he couldn’t smile.

“You’re going to be fine,” Panne said, coming up behind her husband. “You are a taguel – you are strong.”

With a little whimper, Yarne bit back a protest. He didn’t want to argue with his parents. He didn’t want to be afraid. But it was so hard, when he felt like every nerve in his body was buzzing, when his muscles were straining to propel him into a full retreat.

“Now, yer gonna go on in there, and learn lots of stuff!” Donnel said cheerfully, ruffling Yarne’s wild hair. “You’ll make friends before ya know it.”

“And… And nobody’s gonna hurt me, right?” Yarne asked in a small voice.

“You can fight,” Panne said. “If they hurt you, you can fight.” Though her words were meant to embolden him, Yarne only felt anxiety crawling up his throat. He gave a little whine.

“Naw, nobody’s gonna hurt ya!” Donnel said. “You know them kids already, don’t ya?”

“There are… There are dragons in there!” Yarne squeaked, wondering how his father could have forgotten such a horrible thing. Dragons were big and mean and they loved to eat bunnies, for all he knew.

“They’re nice dragons,” Donnel said. “But if any ‘a them kids gives you trouble, your teacher’ll set ‘em right.”

“Y- you promise?”

“Promise,” Donnel said, raising his right hand.

“Class will soon begin,” Panne said. “Go on, Yarne.”

With one last look at his parents, Yarne turned and pushed himself forward into the classroom. It was full of children. He knew most of them, but the place was otherwise stiflingly unfamiliar, with a cacophony of sounds and a mélange of scents that made him dizzy from trying to process them all.

He had met Byleth the week before, with his parents introducing them. He shuffled over to the teacher’s desk, to the one familiar adult in the room, and looked up at him. Byleth was reading through a notebook but looked up when Yarne cleared his throat. “Oh, Yarne,” he said. “Welcome. You’re just in time.”

“Where… Where should I sit?” Yarne asked, glancing at the room. “Can I stay under your desk?”

“No,” Byleth said flatly, standing up. “Alright, class, settle down!” he called, and Yarne flinched from the sudden loud tone.

The students quieted immediately and found their seats. All eyes were now on Yarne. He could feel the fur standing up along his back. “We have a new student today,” Byleth said. “This is Yarne.”

“Hullo, Yarne!” a green-haired girl said, startling Yarne into flinching. He had seen her before – one of the dragons of which he was so terrified. Eager to meet her prey, he thought.

“Would you like to say something?” Byleth asked, and Yarne froze when he realized that he was expected to speak to these people. He looked up with wide eyes and shook his head vigorously; thankfully, Byleth didn’t push the issue. “Alright, please have a seat over there, next to Lucina.”

He knew Lucina, and his eyes went to her immediately. She was sitting at a table on the right, near the large open windows. Perfect escape opportunity, he thought, should things get too hairy. But to get to her, he would have to pass by several others, including the dragon girl. Taking a deep breath, he swallowed his nerves and dashed towards the familiar smiling face.

“ACK!” The next thing he knew, he was looking down at that same face, which was now far from smiling. He had knocked Lucina over, chair and all, and was now on top of her. “Get off!” she said, pushing at him. Sheepishly, he rolled over and crouched on the floor, hiding beneath the empty chair.

“Quite a leap you made, there,” Byleth observed. “Alright, class, settle. Settle!”

The others had begun to talk excitedly. Yarne felt like a perfect fool; he was so used to being outside in wide open spaces that he’d misjudged the distance between Byleth’s desk and Lucina’s table. “S- sorry…” he mumbled as Lucina picked herself and her chair up.

“It’s alright,” she said, her irritation fading in favor of understanding. “Here, take my hand.” She extended her hand to him, and he took it hesitantly. Once he was sitting in his own chair, he lowered his head to the table, hiding behind his folded arms. The chatter of the other students surrounded him like a menacing force.

“Did you see that?! What a jump!”

“Why’d he attack Lucina?”

“I bet he _liiiikes_ her!”

“Hey, Priam, he’s trying to steal your girl!”

“Shut up, assface!”

“QUIET!” Byleth’s command made Yarne jump again, and he buried his face further into his arms. “Now, let’s start, shall we? We’re beginning with a bit of history today because the upcoming festival has significance in many different worlds. The Day of Devotion, as it’s called in Askr…”

Byleth’s voice faded out as Yarne focused on the other students. He could feel them looking at him, and he hid further in his arms, trembling slightly. Only when a warm hand descended on his back did he stop. “It’s OK,” Lucina muttered. “You’re safe here.”

He didn’t believe her, but it was comforting, nonetheless.

The time spent in the classroom was easier than Yarne had thought, though. As the minutes ticked by, he relaxed little by little. It really wasn’t so bad, he thought. The windows were cracked just slightly, allowing a fresh breeze to blow in. The familiar scents of pine, spruce, cedar, and holly comforted him. On the teacher’s desk was a bowl of dried herbs, adding a spicy undertone to the atmosphere. Most importantly, each student was sitting in their own chair. The stifling feeling from before was lessening as Yarne was able to close himself into his own mental space.

Then something hit the back of his head.

“AAAH!” His reaction was instantaneous. Byleth’s lecture was cut off as Yarne slithered out of his seat, dashed under the table, and wheeled around to hide behind the teacher’s desk. All around the room, there were shocked gasps and a few smatterings of laughter.

“Yarne, what is the matter?” Byleth asked calmly.

“Something- _something hit my head!_ ” Yarne could barely control his shaking.

Byleth rounded on the class. “Alright, who did it?”

“Not me!” Shiro said, and Byleth’s sharp gaze zeroed in on him. The boy squirmed in his seat, but he didn’t look guilty (his senses as a mercenary had only been honed through his time as a teacher; he could now smell a lie from a mile away).

Byleth stepped forward and examined the floor. There was a triangle of folded paper. “Aha!” He bent to pick it up. “Passing notes, are we? Let’s see who the guilty party is, now…”

Before he could unfold the paper, Severa stood up. “OK, it was me!” she said, her face as red as her hair. “I was trying to pass a note to Lucina, and it hit Yarne instead! I’m sorry, OK?!” she glanced at Yarne, who was peeking out from behind the desk.

“Severa, the corner.” Byleth pocketed the note (he could paper the entire castle with notes he’d intercepted in class). “Yarne, back to your desk. Please, no more distractions. If you want time in the yard today, we must get through this lesson quickly.”

A chorus of approval rose up from the class, quieted by Byleth’s raised hand. Severa went to stand in the front of the room, and Yarne returned to his seat, still shaken. It had only been a piece of paper, but _what if it hadn’t been?_ He could have been hit with a stone, or worse – and then it would be the end of him. He shivered, the possibilities filling his mind.

For the rest of the lecture, Yarne was on edge. Each slight sound – the scratching of charcoal on paper, the riffling of notebooks, each cough or muffled sneeze – made him twitch all over. Now and then, Lucina murmured words of encouragement, but it was little help. By the end of the hour, Yarne was a nervous wreck.

“Alright,” Byleth announced. “Let’s put our things away, and line up to go to the yard.”

The excitement was palpable. Students jumped out of their seats, and the resulting scrape of chair legs on the floorboards caused Yarne’s ears to flatten to his head. He stood only when Lucina did, and he clung to her sleeve as she lined up with the others. “It’s OK,” she said. “We’re just going to the training yard. It’s fun; you’ll see!”

He didn’t see what could be fun about the training yard. He usually avoided that place. The sounds of battle, though simulated, were too much for him to bear. He shuffled along with the others, his hair bristling as Kana and Kanako walked right behind him, talking excitedly.

The yard itself was a wide area, and it was filled with heroes. Yarne’s eyes darted around in search of viable escape routes as the class filed out into the sunshine. There was a light dusting of snow on the ground. All in all, it had been a mild winter for Askr, but the air was frigid, and Yarne’s fur rustled, trapping pockets of warm air near his skin to keep him comfortable. He spared a brief thought for his classmates, who lacked that handy ability, but the cold didn’t seem to bother them one bit. They were already gathering around the racks, elbowing each other in the dash to select a weapon. Yarne let go of Lucina and backed away timidly.

“Alright, pair off, everyone!” Byleth called, and the children obeyed eagerly.

“Do you want to spar with me?” Lucina asked kindly, but Yarne was backing against the wall.

“No, I’d just get in the way,” he said. “I’ll train with, uh, with someone else. Don’t worry about me!”

Regardless of his request, it was with a worried expression that Lucina turned and went to find someone else.

All around was a confusion of activity – the children had a small section of the yard to themselves, but they weren’t far from the adults who were training together. Yarne backed further into the corner as Saber and Mia’s match got quite frenzied, with swearing and loud clatters of wood against wood. Yarne was so focused on them that he failed to notice the person approaching him.

“You’re so afraid,” said a clear voice, and he jumped, whimpering when he saw the green-haired dragon girl from before. She was smiling at him and standing a few paces away.

“Don’t worry,” she said. “I won’t hurt you. See?” She sat on the ground, heedless of the snow, tucking her legs beneath her and placing her hands in her lap. “My name is Tiki. I’m ever so glad to meet you!”

He regarded her with trepidation and a little bit of panic. She was cutting off his only means of escape; to his left, Cynthia and Owain were facing off with vociferous abandon. “I’m so sorry that you’re frightened,” she continued, making him flinch. “It must be difficult to be around so very many people, when you’re used to being around plants all day.”

He nodded silently. It was very different from the life he had known in the fields. His family lived farther out from the center of the castle complex, in a little house that overlooked the vegetable garden. Every day until now, his mother had taken him to the forests and the ridges, teaching him about the wilderness and about their people. His father’s side of the gene pool was altogether baffling to him.

“I know a little bit how you feel,” Tiki said. “I was once all alone, so this is very different from what I’m used to.”

“Y- you were… all alone?” She was a dragon, but that word – _alone_ – sparked something in Yarne. He felt the hollowness of it, the sorrow, when she said it.

She was smiling, though her eyes were sad. “Yes, it was very hard. That’s why I’m so very happy to be together with everyone here! I know that it can seem scary at first, but it really is better to be together. We can all look after one another!”

He watched her warily, but with a blooming sense of sympathy for her. “Um… I’m- I’m sorry if you were alone.”

She brightened. “Oh, that’s quite alright! I’m not alone anymore. Neither are you!”

He chewed on his lower lip. His eyes darted around, and he shuffled just a bit closer to her when Owain’s back hit the wall to his right. “I- I really am, though… M- my race, the taguel… Well, there’s not so many of us left, anymore…”

Her expression was one of pure sympathy. “How dreadful,” she said.

“If I…” He swallowed. “If something happens to me, then… Then the taguel race is doomed! I- I have to stay safe.”

“That is an awfully big responsibility,” she said seriously. “I’ll help you! My dragon form is strong; I can beat back your enemies and keep you safe!”

His eyes widened. “You… would do that… for me?”

“Of course! You’re my friend!” She beamed at him, extending her hand. Mystified, he took it. “We’re on the same side, so we’re friends! And I would never, never allow my friends to get hurt!”

“Oh… Th- thank you…” He didn’t know what to say. He felt no more fear of her. Looking into her sparkling green eyes, feeling the warmth of her hand in his, he felt a fluttering in his chest – an unfamiliar one, nothing like the terror that he had experienced when first sighting her. Then shame fell over him. He bowed his head. “I… I was afraid of you, because you’re a dragon… Um… I’m sorry…”

“That’s alright! You’re quite timid around everyone, aren’t you?” Tiki stood then, and though she was taller than he, he still felt no fear. “I suppose dragons can appear scary on the battlefield, but we only fight to protect the people we care about.”

His grip tightened in hers. “I- I guess so… You didn’t have to… to talk to me. That was… nice of you.”

“It was no trouble at all!” She dusted herself off with her other hand. “Now I do hope that you will relax a little in class. There’s no safer place to be!”

He could almost – almost – return her smile.

“Do you want to partner up for this lesson?” she asked. “The yard’s too small for us to transform, but we can practice dodging together!”

“D- dodging… Yeah, that sounds good!” He followed her along the wall, to a slightly clearer space.

“Alright, I’m gonna throw snowballs at you!” she giggled, and he jumped a little before smiling and leaning down to scoop snow into his own hands.

“N- not if I get you, first!” he said, and she took him up on that challenge with a hearty laugh and a face full of snow.

>>><<<

Yarne’s parents were there at the end of class, waiting for him in the hallway as the students filed out of the room. Tiki and Lucina were walking with him, and Lucina said a cheerful goodbye before going to join Morgan in their trek to their quarters. Yarne ran to his mother as soon as he saw her; she put her arms around him and knelt to nuzzle the top of his head.

“Still alive, I see!” Donnel chuckled. “How’d yer first day a’ school go?”

“Um…” Yarne turned to see Tiki standing there with a smile.

“It was ever so much fun today!” she said cheerfully. “I have to go now. Will I see you tomorrow?”

Yarne nodded, a little smile tugging at his lips. “Y- yes, I’ll be here. B- bye!”

“Buh-bye!” she said, bounding off with almost taguel-like enthusiasm. Yarne watched her go until his father ruffled his hair.

“Looks like ya made a new friend!”

“Uh-huh… She’s a dragon.” Yarne looked up at his parents. “I think… I wanna come again tomorrow. Can I?”

Panne and Donnel shared a knowing smile. “You did well today,” Panne said. “Of course, you can come back.”

Yarne held onto his father’s hand as they made their way outside. Class wasn’t so bad, after all, he thought.

As long as he could learn to dodge those flying notes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I realized only after writing this that it draws some parallels between Yarne and Nah's supports. But alas, I do not have Nah; and even if I did... Ugh. I'm just not really sure that I want to pair anyone with Nowi. It's just... creepy, you know? I feel like Nowi should be IN this class, not on the PTA. It's one thing to have a character that looks youthful but is actually older, and quite another to have... Well, pedo-bait. Just... no. No, no, no. So sorry, no Nah in this story!


End file.
